Home Alone
by Deidara the Arrancar Alchemist
Summary: With the absence of Pepper Potts, can the famous Tony Stark survive alone for a week?
1. Breakfast

_Inspiration for this fan fiction came when I was watching the film Iron Man, and when Pepper says to Tony "you couldn't even tie your shoelaces without me." It made me wonder what would happen if Pepper wasn't there to help him with the little tasks in life…_

HOME ALONE

It was 7am. The glossy, modern mansion was gloomy inside because the sun had only just begun to rise. It appeared as a blazing red line on the horizon, a smudge of intense light that steadily burned brighter, chasing away the grey of pre-dawn. The dark waves of the warm, Californian sea sighed and moaned as it pounded away at the cliff where the huge, sprawling mansion crouched precariously.

Tony Stark, aka Iron Man, billionaire, genius, play-boy and superhero, yawned as he entered the luxury lounge. He rubbed the sleep from his tired eyes and ran a hand through his dark, tousled hair. His footsteps echoed off the pure white walls, his bare feet slapping against the cool floor. The only light inside came from the glowing devices in the walls and the soft, pale blue sheen cast from the arc reactor on his muscular chest.

"Good morning, sir" came the articulate voice of JARVIS, the mansion's AI.

"Morning, Jarvis," Tony replied. He stood and gazed out at the sunrise for a while, the floor to ceiling window giving him a panoramic view. He stretched, then winced as he felt pain along the side of his torso. He looked down and saw the dark purple bruises along his ribs he received yesterday. Being a superhero was hard work.

He frowned, noticing something. Something that wasn't there to be noticed.

It was quiet. Eerily so. Tony tensed, expecting someone to leap out of the shadows.

"Are you alright, sir?" asked JARVIS, the tiniest hint of concern in his robotic voice.

Tony didn't answer.

Something was wrong.

Something was missing.

"Pepper!" he called out. The sound reverberated off the walls, heard by no one. He felt panic in his veins, and frantically began searching the house for his assistant.

Pepper Potts was usually here for 6am, ready to go about her daily duties. There was a possibility she had slept in, but that didn't sound like Pepper. Maybe she had been hurt last night, but he would have been informed about it.

He was just about to go to the basement when JARVIS cleared his throat to get Tony's attention, even though he had no throat to clear.

"Sir, I think you are missing one crucial issue about the whereabouts of your assistant."

"And that is?" said Stark impatiently and distractedly.

"She is on vacation."

Tony froze, silent. Then he chuckled, which eventually developed into laughter so bad that tears leaked form his eyes.

How could he be so stupid?! He must be losing his wits. Earlier that week, he had invited Pepper down to his basement and they had talked for a while, surrounded by mind-baffling technology and pieces of his alias's suit.

"What do you want, Tony?" his ginger-haired, glamorous assistant had asked.

"I want you to go on vacation" he answered, leaning back in his chair, feet on the cluttered desk.

"I'm sorry, what?" she said with a slight frown.

"I want you to go on vacation" he repeated, this time slower.

"Why?"

"You deserve one," he replied with a small shrug. "After all that's been going on, you're bound to be as stressed as I am. Besides, these past few months, you've always been there for me, and I think you need some time to yourself."

"Really?" said Pepper softly, her admiration for her boss swelling in her heart. Then she frowned. "You're not just doing this to get me out of the way, are you?"

"Excuse me?" he said, eyebrow raised.

"I think the real reason you want me to go is so you can have the place to yourself," she said, folding her arms. "You're probably doing something secretive, or having a party or… I don't know but that would make more sense."

"No no no," Tony said, getting up from the chair. "I'm being serious here." He smiled at her, and Pepper's heart rate increased. "Choose a place. I'll get Hogan to drive you to the airport. Go on, have fun."

Pepper smiled. "Are you sure you're being serious? Honestly?"

"Cross my heart" he replied sketching an X over his arc reactor.

"Thank you, Mr Stark" said Pepper, turning to go out of the room.

"You're welcome, Miss Potts" he said, eyeing her intently as she left.

That was two days ago. Yesterday he hadn't even been here, so this was the first time he had been here alone.

Alone.

He was not usually accustomed to that word. There was nearly always someone here; Pepper, Happy Hogan, Rhodey, colleagues from work, the occasional girl he'd picked up from somewhere. Now it was just him and JARVIS.

Where to begin? He stood there for a while, thinking.

"Coffee," he murmured. Yes, that would wake him up.

He walked into the kitchen, lights turning on automatically at his appearance. This room was as sleek and opulent as all the other rooms in the mansion, as well as enormous and extremely expensive to furbish. He walked over to the cupboards, searching for the coffee jar. Then, he went to the kettle, knowing he to use it for something. For all of his intelligence in the most high-tech machinery, a simple appliance like a kettle was alien to him. When was the last time he used one?

He poured cold water into the kettle, plugged it in and waited for it to heat up. He took out a spoon and unscrewed the coffee jar.

He paused. How much did he need? He didn't like it too strong, so he though it best not to add too much. He put a few spoonfuls of it into the mug just as the kettle gurgled and spewed steam.

Pouring the hot water into the mug, he pondered on what else he needed.

"Sugar" he said to himself. He took out some sugar from the cupboards and added some of that, stirring it slightly.

His fingers touched the edge of the mug, the boiling water also heating up the china cup. The heat seared his finger tips, and he yelped and withdrew his finger. He frowned. This was harder and more painful than he first anticipated.

"What's next?" he said, looking into the dark depths of the coffee. "Ah, milk!"

He strode over to the huge, metallic fridge, a cold breeze caressing his face when he opened the doors. He took out a carton of milk, and opened it, giving it a tentative sniff. He recoiled as the disgusting smell tickled his nostrils.

He dumped it in the bin, hoping there was more milk. There was another carton, but the results were the same as before. Now what?

"I suppose I'll have to do without it" he sighed.

He sipped the coffee, and wrinkled his nose at the taste. No where as good as Pepper's, but it was a start. He didn't need her!

"Yeah," he said to himself, smugly.

His stomach groaned. Food, that was the next step. He braced himself, ready to make breakfast.

After about two hours, Tony finally managed to make a decent meal. Several times, he had actually considered calling Pepper and asking her for tips. But that would have ruined her vacation, and make him look like a total idiot. He asked some assistance from JARVIS, but there was no luck with that.

"Any help, JARVIS?" he asked when he was unsure about the settings on the oven.

"I'm sorry, sir, but you did not build me with the knowledge of operating household appliances." Tony thought he could sense that the AI held back a snigger. "Besides, I am not sure that I would want to intervene."

"And why's that?"

"Because, sir, you are amusing to watch."

Tony was stunned by the answer. He could have sworn that Jarvis was growing more human emotions every day.

In the end, Tony had settled for plain old cereal, but not with any milk, of course. As he munched on the cereal next to his abandoned, self-brewed coffee, he looked around the kitchen. Practically all the cutlery had been used, as were the saucepans. There were stains on the kitchen surfaces and a blackened hole in the tea towel which he had accidently set fire to. Most interesting of all were the squashed pancakes stuck to the ceiling, a few slowly peeling off like old plasters.

He now realised how difficult an ordinary life was. When Pepper got back, he would cut her some slack. Right now, he had to plan how he would survive the rest of the week. Pizza delivery was his main food option, maybe throw in a couple of cheeseburgers.

As he set about trying to tidy up the mess he'd caused, he promised himself not to tell anyone about this. Especially Pepper. She'd never let him forget this.


	2. Washing machine

_Yay! Another chapter!! I was going to leave it as it was because of lack of inspiration, but thanks to my sister's good sense of humour, she gave me some more motivation for another chapter. Enjoy! ^^_

Tony put away the last piece of cutlery with a relieved sigh. After the mess he had made out of breakfast, it had taken him a long time washing and wiping up the plates and saucepans, as well as cleaning away the irritatingly stubborn stains all over the once glistening counters and oven hob.

There was no way he was going to even touch the inside of the oven. It was caked with crumbling soot and had belched so much smoke that the smoke detectors had shrieked urgently about four times. Better leave the cleaning of the appliance's charcoal-black throat to the professionals. Whoever they were.

The lights dimmed sleepily as he closed the door on the kitchen. He walked into the lounge and was embraced by warm, mid-morning sunshine. The rolling waves sparkled almost magically in the light, seagulls visible as pale streaks gliding on the soft breeze. Tony smiled. His hectic lifestyle hardly left him time to admire the magnificent location of his favourite house; his home.

_Ok, time's wasting, _he thought _What to do now?_

He looked down at himself, and could have slapped himself for his stupidity. How could he fail to realize that he was dressed in nothing but dark blue boxers? As much as he would have preferred just lounging around all day in his underpants, he thought it would be better to get some clothes on. He could imagine what the pizza guy would say when he would arrive later on.

He went up to his bedroom and headed for the wardrobe. When he first entered the room, he realized how little time he spent in here now. Very few nights had he actually slept in the bed beside him, instead snatching a few hours on the couch in the basement or in the lounge and only using the bed for other purposes.

The bed was a mess of tangled sheets and the pillows were tossed on the floor. There was even a rip in the duvet. The last time he'd slept here, he'd had nightmares.

Tony had had nightmares ever since he was captured by the Ten Rings. Most of his dreams were haunted with images of the torturing he had suffered, broken images of Yinsen inserting the old car battery into his chest, his fights with the treacherous Obadiah Stane and other enemies. But mainly Pepper featured in his nightmares. Almost every time she was in danger, and he'd rushed as fast as he could to save her, rescue her, but he'd always been too late. He shuddered as he played her screams in his mind.

He pushed aside morbid thoughts of dark dreams and focused on the wardrobe. He slid it open and frowned.

It was almost empty. The only clothing in there were clothes he hated and had no idea why he had them, or unsuitable for staying at home, such as one of his favourite tuxedos.

He closed the wardrobe and wondered what he could wear.

"Perhaps Miss Potts left some clothes in the laundry, Mr Stark?" suggested JARVIS. The AI's toneless, mechanical voice caught Tony by surprise, but he nodded in agreement.

"Good thinking Jarvis."

He ventured through the enormous house to the small utility room. This room was foreign to him; it was more of Pepper's domain. Two washing machines and a tumble dyer lined the far wall, and an ironing board was propped up against the right hand side. There was a basket of clothes nearby, but by the looks of them, they were all dirty. There weren't any clean clothes lying around. Pepper must have forgotten to make sure his wardrobe was full. That was unusual for her.

"Looks like I'm gonna have to clean some of these" he said, picking up some clothes that smelt of his sweat.

"Are you sure you will be alright doing this, sir?" asked JARVIS, a note of panic in his voice. After what the AI had seen from breakfast time, Tony couldn't blame him for his concern.

"Of course" Tony replied hotly, not wanting to be defeated by another simple task. Once was a little embarrassing, but more than that was just plain humiliation.

He rummaged through the basket, picking out some clothes. He settled for some jeans and a plain white t-shirt. He walked to the washing machine, then stopped. There were different settings for different materials. What settings to use?

He placed the clothes in the washing machine on the right, closed the door and looked for some washing powder or liquid. He spotted a bottle of liquid on a nearby shelf and poured in a little of the stuff in the compartment. He paused, and then poured in a lot more. Judging from the smell of the clothes, he thought they would need a great deal of scrubbing.

Now, to figure out the settings. Hot or cold? He decided on about 37°C. He leaned back against the wall nearby, waiting. The washing machine rumbled to life and its metallic drum slowly filled with water. It was rather unsettling to watch. It reminded Tony of when a ship was sinking and water was gushing into the hold through a tear in the craft's fabric, drowning all inside…

_Relax, Tony! _He told himself. _Just a washing machine for crying out loud!_

After a while of watching the churning, bubbling liquid of the washing machine, his thoughts began to wander. They turned to Pepper, off on vacation in Dubai, probably relaxing on some warm, sandy beach, in her bikini. Pepper in a bikini. _Not a bad thought _he chuckled to himself.

"Erm, sir?" asked JARVIS tentatively, dispelling the image from his head.

"Hmm?" he said absent-mindedly.

"It appears that the washing machine is, how shall I put it, out of control."

"What!" he exclaimed.

Tony gasped in alarm as the washing machine was trembling violently, shuddering as if an earthquake was trapped within it. It growled and snarled like an angry beast, pulling away from the wall as it lurched forwards like a drunken man. The flex was as taut as a bowstring.

But the most terrifying thing was that thick, ebony smoke curled out from the back, the first flickers of fire visible. For the fifth time that day, the smoke detector wailed.

"Bloody hell!" Tony cried, spluttering and coughing as he searched for a fire extinguisher. Where was that damned robotic helper when he needed it?! It could mist him with foam when he wasn't even combusting, but when there was an actual fire….

He lunged forwards and unplugged the thing, and soon the wild appliance started to become still, but it still spat out black smoke. Swearing to himself, he dashed upstairs and grabbed a nearby fire extinguisher. He ran back down again and almost ferociously battled the flames. He resisted the urge to shout "DIE!"

After a minute or two of frantic foam spaying and a volley of swear words interrupted by coughing fits, the flame died down and vanished. Tony threw open the window, trying to banish the last tendrils of smoke.

Panting, he collapsed to the floor in front of the once-possessed washing machine. The fire extinguisher fell from his hands with a hollow clang and rolled away slightly.

"Sir?!" JARVIS cried.

"I'm OK" Tony mumbled in reply. When escaping the Ten Rings's camp in his Mark I suit, he'd been resistant to the orange flames that scorched the metal plating. He was no fireman, so he knew he'd been lucky battling the almost inferno that had spouted from the machine.

Growling, he got to his feet and kicked the broken thing with all his might and cursed it. With an almost comical wheeze, the door opened and his clothes tumbled out.

Picking them up, he saw that he had ruined them. The white t shirt was now stained a pale blue from the jeans, and the jeans themselves were all crumpled. Tossing them aside, he took out some different clothes from the laundry basket, not caring that they were stinky.

Stupid Pepper! If he hadn't been daydreaming about her, perhaps this disaster wouldn't have been so bad. Damn her perfect figure!

"Don't feel so annoyed with yourself, sir," said JARVIS, a hint of dry humour entering his voice. "At least you didn't use the iron. We would have had to rush you to A & E."

"Shut up, JARVIS."

_Hope you enjoyed it! A few more chapters coming up in the future!_


	3. Rhodey

_Woo! Another a chapter guys! Sorry if the update took so long, but it took a while to think of more ideas. And there may be only one or two more updates in the future, so sorry!_

Tony relished the warm water that trickled over his face, feeling the strength return to his tired bones and his muscles relax. He pushed his hair out of his face and closed his eyes, standing there for a few moments and just letting the warmth spread over his body and let the water wash away the weariness. He could feel the steam condense on his skin, smell the fragrance of the new shampoo he'd brought the other day.

After he'd had a well deserved shower and towled himself dry, he went to put his unwashed clothes back on, but then paused. Examining the dirty material, he realised it was filthier than he first thought. There was no way that he was going to use the spare washing machine in the utility room: that room was a bombsite, no mans land. Looks like he'd have to clean them the old fashioned way.

Tony ran the enormous bath that dominated his luxury bathroom, and watched the water rise to fill the pristine white tub. He added in some soap, and dropped the clothes in there, leaving them to soak for a while.

When the clothes were a little less grimy than before, he went to the balcony and left them to dry. The Californian sun was baking hot at this time of the day, so they should be dry in no time at all.

The heat of the sun reminded him of the time. He glanced down at his wrist, but he was wearing a watch.

"JARVIS, time?" he asked.

"Just gone 1 o'clock sir," the AI replied. "Time certainly flies when you're having fun, wouldn't you agree."

"Your sense of fun is a lot different to mine" Tony scowled. His stomach suddenly grumbled like an avalanche down a ski slope.

"Hungry already, sir?" JARVIS teased.

Tony himself was surprised. Then again, his breakfast wasn't exactly satisfying. He didn't want to cause another kitchen nightmare, so he thought he'd stick to take-away.

"JARVIS, order me the usual."

"And what would the usual be?"

Tony gritted his teeth. "I don't know, just order a pizza. Preferably large, with a lot of cheese."

"Right away, sir."

Tony pulled on his clothes, and reminded himself that he didn't have time to waste. He needed this break for superhero missions so he could upgrade and repair his suit. Yesterday, it had been badly damaged when he was escaping from an enemy weapon manufacturer, one that had once been a big customer of his Stark technology. If he had known that they were stealing his ideas, moulding and advancing it to their own standards, and using them against innocent people, then he would have dealt with them a long time ago. The escape had been difficult, and he had only just managed to get away as they launched all kinds of destructive, super advanced missiles at him. He'd quickly torched the place down before they could bring out the more heavy artillery. The mission had left him with a series of minor cuts and bruises all over. He was also bruised down one side of his chest, and he feared for a fractured rib which fortunately was not true. What had worried him the most was that there had been significant damage to his arc reactor, and he'd hastily repaired it as soon as he got home.

He went down to the basement and entered the code to open the door. He glanced at the newly fixed windows to the right, the ones he'd smashed with his repulsor rays when he was testing out the Mark III suit. He had mixed emotions about that memory: guilt for allowing the Jericho missile to fall into the hands o the Ten Rings, but then there was a sense of fulfilment that he'd managed to destroy the world's most powerful missile and make sure that the people of Gulmira were safe.

The basement was his favourite room in this house, in all of his houses in fact. He felt very comfortable down here; he was in his element among the pieces of metal and wires and machinery and computers, not to mention his prized cars lined up against one side of the wall.

Tony smiled to himself, and got to work.

**

Half an hour later, JARVIS interrupted him from his work.

"Sir?"

"Hold on a minute, JARVIS, I'm a little busy at the moment." Tony was soldering something incredibly tiny to something else that was equally tiny, and he needed full concentration in order to finish it properly.

"Sir?"

"JARVIS, I'm busy!"

"You said to give you a minute, and a minute has passed. There is someone at the door."

"Who?"

"Your friend, Colonel Rhodes."

"Rhodey?" Tony looked up and his hand slipped, and with a soft hiss, the two pieces of metal welded together in completely the wrong way. Tony swore. "Now look what you made you do, you piece of annoying technology!"

JARVIS sniggered.

"If you do that again, I'm going to take out your voice chip so you can't irritate me with your sarcastic annoyingness!"

"You wouldn't do that, sir!" said JARVIS. "I've helped you this far."

Hindered more than helped" Tony grumbled as he walked upstairs.

"I'm sorry, sir" said JARVIS softly. Tony was astonished to hear actual regret in the articulate, robotic tone.

Tony opened the door, and saw his friend James Rhodes standing in the doorway. "Hey, Tony" he greeted with a smile.

"Hey, Rhodey," Tony answered. "Wanna come in?"

"Sure." Rhodey walked in as Tony shut the door. He looked at his billionaire, superhero friend and frowned. "Oh, man."

"What?" Tony said uncertainly.

"She really did leave you home alone."

"Come again?"

"Pepper. Said she was going on vacation."

"How do you know?" Tony frowned.

"Met her at the airport," explained Rhodey. "I was coming back from giving some new pilots their first training session. When I saw her alone, I was a bit concerned. She said that you let her take a couple of days off work so she could go on vacation. I told her that she shouldn't have left you alone."

"What are you trying to say, Rhodey?"

"What I'm saying is that you couldn't last a day without Pepper's help."

Tony felt heat rise under his skin. "You what?"

Rhodey laughed. "Well, just look at you man! You're wearing clothes that would look better on a hobo, and I doubt that you can cook a decent meal. And-" he sniffed the air. "And, there's the smell of smoke in here. Did you burn something?"

"Might have done."

"Tony" Rhodey sighed.

"Just give me a chance," said Tony. "I know I can look after myself."

"Tony, you're 43 years old! Most teenagers can look after themselves!"

"Yeah, well, maybe I didn't have time to do any of that when I was a kid." Tony's voice trailed off to the past.

Rhodey sighed. "You call me if you need anything, OK?"

"Will do," Tony replied, his cheery voice back. "Except, I won't be needing any help. Hey, you wanna stay for some pizza."

"You're not making it, are you?" Rhodey's face was full of worry.

"Nah, I ordered it."

Rhodey breathed out a sigh of relief. "You had me worried there for a sec, man."

"Sir, your pizza is here" JARVIS informed them.

"About time to, I'm starving."


	4. Alcohol

_Here's another chapter everyone! I hope you enjoy this one, and thanks for waiting so patiently. Remember, more reviews equals faster updates!_

The day had flown past like a falcon swooping in for the kill, night's blanket already cast across the sky. Stars shimmered in the deep purple of the darkness as the soft yellow lights in the mansion automatically switched on and threw pale luminosity against the white building, enhancing the shadows where the light couldn't reach.

Tony sat back on the sofa with a satisfied sigh and a slight groan. "I'm stuffed."

"Maybe you shouldn't have eaten so much," replied Rhodey sitting near him. "Careful, you might explode."

"Ha ha" said Tony without much enthusiasm. Glancing down at the large, empty, cardboard pizza box scattered with a few crumbs, he realised that perhaps he should go on a diet. He didn't want to become fat, or else he wouldn't be able to fit into his suit. Now that, was worrying.

There was a few moments of silence cut only by the faint hum of electrical equipment and the whoosh of the indoor waterfall as it cascaded downwards. Tony's arc reactor glowed subtly through his t shirt.

"Maybe I should get going, Tony," said Rhodey standing up and stretching. "I gotta finish something for tomorrow."

"You sure?" said Tony, hiding the note of sadness and desperation in his voice. If Rhodey left now, he'd be left alone with nothing but a sarcastic robot to mock his every effort.

"Yeah," said Rhodey, smiling softly. "I'll see ya around. And call me if you need something."

"Gotcha" said Tony with a nod. He closed the door after his friend, and sighed.

"Look's like it's just you and me again, sir" said JARVIS.

"Hooray" muttered Tony.

"If I try and be more helpful, will you tolerate my presence?" JARVIS said hopefully.

"Fine, whatever" answered Tony. "But be good, OK?"

"Indeed, sir!"

Tony picked up the pizza box and headed for the kitchen so he could put it in the bin. He winced slightly at the havoc he'd caused a few hours ago. He crossed the room to the bin, but stopped in his tracks.

The bin was overflowing with burned and squashed food and packaging, vomiting out a disgusting mixture and a ghastly smell. Two cartons of off milk hadn't exactly helped the stench.

Tony clamped a hand over his nose and braved the nasty odour that had almost entirely engulfed the room, creeping forwards. He placed the pizza box on top, but it slid off and he caught it one-handed just before it hit the floor. He tried again more carefully this time, balancing it precariously. It wobbled, but stayed put. Tony smiled behind his hand covering his nose, and walked away backwards from the bin.

Schwep! Following the unusual noise came a sudden darkness over his eyes, and Tony cried out and pulled off whatever was obscuring his vision.

"What the?"

A tattered pancake lay in his hands, and looking up, Tony saw a dark, sticky, circular patch on the wall above his head. One of the pancakes that had clung to the ceiling earlier must have decided to drop off at exactly the opportune moment.

Tony screwed it up into a squishy, dry ball and threw it at the bin. The bin quivered and toppled over, spitting out the vile substances inside. Tony cursed, but stopped halfway through speaking the word as the smell reached his nose. His eyes widened, and he ran out from the room into the lounge.

He gasped in a great lungful of fresh air, shaking the smell out of his memory. He could sense a silence around him that trembled slightly.

"Don't even think about laughing at me, JARVIS!" Tony said.

"The thought had even crossed my mind, sir" the AI replied, but it was obvious that it was a great struggle to not laugh.

Tony scowled and went to the mini bar he had. He poured himself a vintage brandy and swallowed in one gulp. He paused, and then drank another glass.

"Sir, are you alright?" said JARVIS. "You can't be that stressed."

"I'm not stressed," Tony answered. "I just haven't had any alcohol for a couple of days, and I'm getting withdrawal symptoms."

"Whatever you say, sir" said JARVIS uncertainly.

Within a matter of moments, Tony had consumed three brandies, four glasses of sake, some rum, and a couple of shots. By the end, he was as unsure on his feet as a newborn lamb.

"I'm feeling kinda dizzy, JARVIS" said Tony, his words slurred as he clung to the wall for support. The room teetered and swayed before his eyes, and every sound pressed against his skull.

"That's because you're drunk, sir" JARVIS commented drily.

"I'm not dunk!" protested Tony. "See, I'm perfectly-" He pushed himself off the wall and immediately slipped and fell painfully on his backside.

"Fine?" suggested JARVIS.

"Ah-huh" Tony said, clambering to his shaky feet. "Maybe I should lie down."

"Yes, maybe you should."

"JARVIS, you're the best" Tony said with a giddy smile.

"I know" the AI replied with a sigh.

Tony lurched up to his room, falling over occasionally, and humming a song he loved, but it was all out of tune. He swayed and went the wrong way, heading out to the massive pool he had.

The pool shone a luminous turquoise and was lit up by dozens of spotlights, the water rippling and rolling peacefully. Tony staggered around, knowing he was heading the wrong way but unable to stop himself. There was a puddle on the mosaic tiles bordering the pool, and Tony stepped on the slippery surface and collapsed rather comically into the water's embrace.

He yelled as the cold water slammed against him, a flurry of bubbles trailing from his stunned mouth as he fell downwards. He waved his limbs about frantically, his usually athletic muscles working in harmony but now just flailing around like a mad man.

Instinct eventually blossomed, and Tony kicked out and headed for the surface, taking an almighty wheeze of air and spewing out chlorine tasting water. He swam to the edge and heaved himself out after a few attempts. He rolled onto the side and coughed up the last few droplets of pool water, groaning. He looked up at the night sky painted above him, and he could just imagine himself in his Iron Man suit soaring across the gloom, a trail of fire in his wake, the gold-titanium alloy of the suit glistening vibrant crimson and gold. One day, he would build a suit that he could fly to the stars with.

He started half singing, half humming a very discordant tune of "Iron Man" by Black Sabbath, smiling slightly to himself. He loved being the superhero he was. He loved nothing more than what he had become.

He glanced down at the blue shine radiating from his arc reactor that rose and fell with his breathing, and his thoughts cleared for a moment and turned to Yinsen. He owed the man his life, and he hoped wherever he was that he was happy, and with the family Tony knew he missed more than anything.

"Rest in peace, my friend" he murmured, the last word turning into a quiet snore.


	5. Memories

_Aha! Another chapter for all you Iron Man fans! Just in case, you're unaware of the time that's passed, it's Day 2 in the Stark house, so get ready for more, erm… adventures! Please note that there is mild swearing in this chapter, and that it is a lot more serious than previous chapters. The next chapter should be quite funny though ^^_

Tony awoke with a throbbing, skull-stabbing headache as a result of polluting his bloodstream with alcohol. His hangover made him feel as sick as a parrot, and when he cracked open his bloodshot eyes; the soft light of dawn was almost blindingly white. He moaned and licked his dry lips, forcing his eyelids open a millimetre at a time. He groaned again as his stomach convulsed and churned, his head spinning momentarily. He slowly raised his head and looked around.

He found out that he was laying spread-eagled on the pristine tiles beside the pool, one of his feet half-submerged in the turquoise water. His clothes were still slightly damp and smelled on chlorine, and his hair stuck up in stiff peaks where he'd fainted whilst it was still drenched. His breathe smelled bad and there was a horrible taste in his mouth. Usually, he was quite good at handling his drink, but perhaps he'd overdone it this time, or maybe it was because he hadn't gotten this pissed on alcohol for a long while. His superhero duties reduced his free time.

Another groan rolled out form his lips and he put his head back on the cool tiles, letting the heat of the morning sun dry out the last few, persistent drops of moisture that clung to his skin. He could see some birds fly across the pure, stark blue sky, the dark little specks soaring high like clouds carried by the wind.

_Come on, Tony, get up you lousy bastard_. He made himself get up, and felt his stiff muscles protest as he got shakily to his feet.

"Thank goodness, sir!"

"Argh!" Tony cried, almost toppling into the pool again.

"Sorry to make you jump, sir," continued JARVIS. "I was wondering when you were going to wake up. If it wasn't for your snoring, I would have mistaken you for dead."

"Shut up, JARVIS" sighed Tony half-heartedly, rubbing his temples. He staggered forwards, lurching around as if the alcohol still had dominion over his actions. Tony was confused, and wondered what was best for him. He was starving, but then again he felt like he was going to be sick. He wanted to sleep, but he also wanted to get his tired muscles working. But he knew one thing, and that was that his gullet was parched dry.

He half-walked, half-stumbled into the kitchen and got himself a glass of water. He gulped it down in one go, then refilled his glass and drained it with shaking fingers. He let out a satisfied gasp, and leaned against the polished cabinets.

His stomach growled and demanded food, but Tony paused before opening the cupboards. Was food a good idea when he was feeling so sick? He shrugged and sighed, helping himself to some biscuits. They were dry and a little stale, and slipped down his raw throat sharply with the help of a little more water.

"JARVIS," mumbled Tony, running a hand through his wet hair. "Next time I feel like drinking myself stupid, force me to stop. I used to be able to handle worse than what I guzzled last night, but now, it's taking its toll. As Iron Man, I shouldn't be wasting my life on drink. At least not as much as normal. So please, remind me."

"Will do, sir" said JARVIS. Tony could imagine the AI scribbling down the reminder on a sheet of paper with a pen.

Suddenly, it felt like a iron-clawed hand was shoved down his oesophagus and squeeze his stomach. Tony clutched his belly and gasped, eye widening and clapping a hand over his mouth.

"I think I'm going to be sick!" he mumbled. He staggered out of the pale and into the bathroom, and spewed out a disgusting, green tinted whitish vomit flecked with pieces of mush. He retched and shook with the effort of chucking out the contents of his stomach, grapping the sides of the toilet seat so tightly that his knuckles turned white.

After he was done, he fell back and leaned against the cold wall of the floor, a noise like a hoarse whimper escaping his vocal cords. He breathed in deeply and slowly, wheezing and wiping his mouth on a towel. He trembled and cold sweat beaded on his forehead like fresh dew. He closed his eyes and counted his heavy heartbeats that hammered his ribs. The dim blue light of his arc reactor brushed his eyelids, and threw strange patterns on his face in the unlit room.

This kind of sickness reminded him of the time when Obadiah had ruthlessly wrenched out his arc reactor when he wanted to steal the technology for himself. Of course, the pain Tony had suffered was far worse then than the sickness that was gripping him at the time being. He still remembered that fateful night…

**

Tony felt the shrill, eardrum-piercing wail of the technology that Obadiah Stane held at the side of his head. It shook his brain and froze his blood. He couldn't even move, couldn't even force his lungs to operate properly, couldn't even make his weakening heart pump enough oxygen around his body.

He inched his eyes slightly to face Stane, the treacherous bastard. The white-bearded man pushed him back on the sofa gently, but this tender action was still as sinister as the betrayal about to take place.

Tony couldn't get his brain into gear very well, the dialogue faded and muddled up. Tony could barely remember the conversation, so the memory of the dark event was as washed out as Stane's words. Forcing his sluggish and agonised mind to focus on what his old friend said to him. Tony struggled against the pain and numbness that had encased his frozen body. Whilst Tony battled silently, Obadiah talked casually, almost as if they were having a friendly chat.

"When I ordered the hit on you," began Obadiah, sitting next to him on the cream sofa. "I was worried that I was killing the golden goose. But, you see, it was just fate that you survived it, leaving one last golden egg to give. You really think that just because you have an idea, it belongs to you? Your father, he helped give us the atomic bomb. Now what kind of world would it be today if he was as selfish as you?"

Tony could not reply, but he knew what kind of thing she would have said in return.

The next few moments were as hazy as a desert mirage. All Tony could remember was the hiss of steam as the metal instrument sliced through his sweat-drenched t shirt, its sudden crushing grip that made him gasp in pain, the brilliant white light of what was effectively his mechanical heart being pulled out and shown to him before he was going to die. Obadiah held it under Tony's nose, taunting him cruelly with the one thing that kept him alive, the light of the arc reactor casting an ugly, ashen sheen on his wrinkled, shiny-topped head as he grinned wickedly through the thick white beard around his face. He remembered Stane telling him that Pepper would be in danger soon as he placed the arc reactor in a silver case, the light dying as he closed the lid. Without another word, Obadiah left him to let the life slowly drain out of his pores.

Tony could faintly recall how he stumbled downstairs, and how is hard felt as though it was being punctured by a dozen bullets and pounded with heavy hammers at the same time. He could feel his burning skin become slippery with icy sweat as he crawled along the floor of the basement, making one final, desperate lunge for his old arc reactor that had become a present for Pepper. However, just as his trembling fingertips brushed the glass case, his strength left him and he collapsed, defeated.

Then he heard a soft whir and a helpful robotic arm edged towards him, holding the arc reactor case. Tony was at a loss for words for a moment , or maybe that was the lack of oxygen in his brain.

"Good boy" he whispered, and smashed the casing with the last few drops of energy. He hastily fitted it into the empty, gaping hole, attaching the wires and electromagnet, his heart bursting out in one massive beat as it managed to operate properly again, a hoarse gasp forced from his mouth with the heavy jolt. He could no longer stay alert, and so he slipped into unconciousness, a wall of black before his eyes. The next thing he would know would be Rhodey shaking him awake, and him suiting up to go defeat Obadiah and rescue Pepper.

**

That all happened six months ago, and was his greatest adventure so far. He felt a little better now, and he cautiously stood up and flushed the toilet, wrinkling his nose in revulsion as the vile substance swirled around before being swallowed with a gurgle by the drains.

"Sir, I think you should get into bed," JARVIS said tenderly, startling Tony again.

"I agree," replied Tony. He paused before adding "You're not going to be my sick nurse, are you?"

"Of course not," the AI answered. "I would be terrible for my reputation."

"_Your_ reputation?" snorted Tony, some of his old dry humour seeping back into his voice. "I'm a superhero, and you're an Artificial Intelligence. Without _me,_ _you_ wouldn't exist."

JARVIS didn't reply for a few heartbeats. "Point taken, sir."

Tony smirked to himself, and went upstairs to his bedroom, where he nestled down deeply into the duvets and closed his eyes. Within a couple of seconds, he was snoring soundly.

_End of Chapter 5! Please review if you like it, and criticisms are welcome. _


	6. Maid

_Disclaimer: I do not own Iron Man or any of the characters featured in the story, though I own the events which are entirely fictional and of my own making, and now, I own this new character coming up in this chapter! _

_Perhaps this chapter will be a little more humorous. Yay! Sorry if it took forever to update. _

Tony was having a very odd dream. Usually, dark shadows stalked his subconscious mind, nightmares of the past caressing his mind with cold, clammy fingers and foul breathe. This time, however, Tony was thankful that the dream was anything but frightening. In fact, it was rather pleasant and quite…appealing.

Tony saw himself in his mind's eye strolling over hillocks of golden sand under a turquoise sky devoid of clouds. At first, Tony thought he was in a desert, until as he crested another soft, crumbling hill, he saw with surprise a great expanse of pure blue that melted into the sky, broken only by the occasional white ridge as it rolled and hissed. The sea. He was at a beach? A secluded one at that, for it appeared that he was the only living thing here.

Shielding his eyes against the harsh white glare of the sun, Tony scanned the shore for anyone, anything. It seemed as empty as a poor man's pocket, but hen suddenly a black speck leapt up out of the horizon. Closer inspection marked it as a person.

He ran down the slopes of shifting sand, a few grains pricking his eyes as the warm wind blew into his face. As he neared the speck, it began to take a distinctive shape, turning more humanoid until he could identify it with delighted surprise. Pepper Potts turned to face him with a sultry smile and a glint in her eyes, her flaming hair flying like a crimson flag on the warm wind. Tony slowed down and walked up to her, eyeing her slender figure with a smirk, and admiring her curves and how perfectly that bikini made her a hell of a lot hotter!

"Tony" she murmured, and coming so close to him that she filled his entire vision, she planted a delicious kiss on his lips.

"Mr Stark."

Tony frowned, wondering where that voice had come from. Pepper couldn't talk whilst her mouth was over his. Besides, the voice was unfamiliar and had a strange accent.

"Mr Stark!" it repeated, this time stronger and more persistent, each syllable dragging Tony away from the dream. Her clung to it as hard as he could, but it was ripped from his grip and with a futile "no!" he awoke.

"No…." he groaned, shielding his eyes from the shaft of sunlight that tickled his eyelashes.

"_Si,_ Mr Stark," said that unusual voice again. "It's late o'clock! 3pm to be precise! Now, get up!"

Blinking reluctantly, Tony cracked open his eyes and sat up with a yawn. He passed a hand over his tired face and examined the woman before him.

She was not Pepper, to Tony's disappointment, but someone he was certain he'd never seen before. She was short, petite, and quite skinny. She had bronze skin and soft black hair pulled back in a bun out of her caramel, inquisitive eyes. She wore a white blouse and black trousers, both of which were ironed to straight perfection. Her white high-heels were spotless and one of her feet was tapping impatiently, each rap echoing on the polished floor like a hammer-strike. Her lips were pursed in disdain, a frown pushing her thin eyebrows together. She appeared to be of Mediterranean origin, maybe Spanish or Italian, and might have been in her late twenties.

"_Por fin_!" she exclaimed, shaking her head. "Finally! You've been asleep for God knows how long! And you've left the house in a truly awful state, and you haven't done any work at all. What is this, a vacation? _Fatal!_"

"I hope you don't mind me asking, but who the hell are you?" said Tony confused, standing up to face her (she barely reached his shoulders). "And who let you in here? This is private property!"

"Your AI did not explain?" the strange woman replied and then tutted. "So disorganised. JARVIS sent me here, and said it was urgent. I now know what he meant."

"JARVIS" Tony threatened darkly under his breathe.

"Sorry, sir," answered JARVIS sheepishly. "I had no choice."

"Who exactly are you, and why are you here? You must have a good reason for ordering me around. If you don't, I suggest you remove yourself from my presence."

"I am Camilla de Leon," she explained. "I am, effectively, a maid. I happen to be a good friend of your assistant Virginia Potts, and have 6 years experience. Your AI hired me to sort out the mess you've created, and I expect some decent payment at the end of my hard efforts."

"Erm… OK then," said Tony, still as confused as ever. He saw Camilla frown deeper and her eyes flicker up to his chest, where his arc reactor was like a pale blue beacon of curiosity. Tony coughed and crossed his arms over his chest, attempting in vain to cover his life-saving device. "How much do you charge?"

"$100 at least."

"What!" Tony cried. "That's, that's just ridiculous!"

"I would disagree," said Camilla with a hand on her hip. "Now, if you don't mind, I shall attempt to clean up this pigsty. Please don't get in my way or ask any pointless questions. I will be out of your way in a few hours and I'm not leaving until I receive my payment. _Entender_?"

"Yes, Ma'm!" said Tony mocking a soldier's salute and obedient voice. He smirked as Camilla replied "Don't play funny with me, Mr Stark!"

"Relax, Ms de Leon," said Tony. "Start off in the kitchen, it's the worst there. Oh, and please don't go to the basement or any other restricted sections, even though you need my permission and password, clear?"

With a 'humph', Camilla turned around and with clacking heels she left the room. The air become a lot lighter in her absence.

"JARVIS, why did you send such a miserable banshee to tidy up the mansion? You could have got someone a lot better, say, at least five chicks that will clean up for free and allow me to pay them in a different way to money?"

The AI sighed, and if he had shoulders he would have shrugged. "Apologies, sir, but she has a good reputation and I sent for someone who would resist your charms."

"I suppose I'll just have to put up with her," Tony grumbled as he smoothed down his bed covers and was about to go to the bathroom for a wash. He paused, then took the duvet and crumpled it up, tossing pillows to the floor and laughing wickedly. "I mean, she can't be that bad. Can she?"

What poor Tony Stark didn't know was that there would be a lot more trouble brewing.

_I sincerely hoped you liked that chapter, and maybe it wasn't that funny, but I tried. Please do tell if my own character Camilla is a horrific mistake. _


	7. Hacking

_Another update, whoo! Oh yeah, if anyone was wondering what those italics were at the bottom of the last chapter which I deleted after I realised they were still there, that was just random notes. Please ignore them, they aren't important. _

_Oh yeah, and sorry for the slow update, as I've been SO preoccupied with all my other stories as well as the accursed writer's block._

_Now, on with the story which I shall attempt to make amusing. If anyone's wondering how much time has passed, it's still Day 2, and it's the late afternoon. _

Tony walked down the short flight of white stairs to his basement, tapping in the opening password with one hand whilst he looked at his watch. Camilla was right, it was pretty late. He was asleep for about 9 or 8 hours, but at least now he felt a lot better. His migraine had vanished, and his stomach was back to normal and demanding food; food that was in the kitchen, which was out of bounds whilst Camilla was in there.

The door swung open with a soft hiss, and Tony checked for any grumpy, curious maids before closing it again. If he hid down here for a while, he could get his house cleaned without having Camilla's accusations hammering another headache into his skull. Tony made a mental note to himself that he should keep the mansion tidier till Pepper came back, so then JARVIS would need to hire de Leon again.

The lights flickered on without a sound and illuminated Tony's favourite room in the mansion. His basement was the one place he could escape the chaotic life he lead, where he could have fun whilst doing what he did best: dreaming up amazing and impossible technology and building it himself from scratch. He could be entertained for weeks on end if he had a truly brilliant idea.

His footsteps echoed softly as they reflected off the cream walls of the spacious room as he walked towards the sleek fridge in the corner of the room, feeling the cold mist bite his fingers. His hand hovered over a can of beer, but after that horrible sickness he thought better of it, and grabbed a soda instead. He collapsed into a plush, leather-covered office chair with a sigh and turned to face one of the many state-of-the-art computer screens that he had. The paper-thin, blank screen flashed into life as he turned it on, casting a bluish light onto his face, not unlike the arc reactor's glow. A window flickered up demanding a series of passwords. Tony tapped in all seven of them in a matter of seconds and with a positive ping from the system, he could access all his documents.

He scanned quickly through his email inbox. They were all messages from other companies, the media, and several impatient, demanding emails from Nick Fury. Tony scowled at the screen. He was always being hassled around by that man, sent off across the globe, here, there, and everywhere, smashing into secret underground organizations trying to take over the world (as usual), stopping acts of terrorism, defeating people that dressed up in bizarre outfits modified with weaponry that were for some reason trying to kill him. It was all superhero stuff, and even though it was thrilling and exciting and adrenaline-sparking, as well as the duty he'd sworn to, it was also risky, chaotic and nerve-wrecking, not to mention life-threatening. And it didn't help that every spare minute he would get a private phone call or password-protected email (it was all very hush-hush in his line of work) from Fury ordering him around. Strangely, he hadn't received anything in the two days he'd had to himself, alone in his mansion. The emails he'd obtained weren't orders, but just updates on their "position" at the moment, and so on.

He was about to click off when something caught his eye. Sent at 7:09 pm yesterday, he'd received a message from Pepper Potts. He smirked to himself and clicked on it. It read:

_Tony,_

_How are you? Is the house still in one piece? I'm sure you'll be fine on your own (crosses fingers), but if you ever need help, feel free to tell me. _

_It's really is beautiful here in Dubai. It's 40°C here everyday, and the people are all so friendly. It was nice of you to lend me your mansion at the Palm Island, and to allow me to have a vacation in the first place. It was very considerate of you, but I can't help thinking there's some other reason. I'll talk to you in three days time when I'm on the plane home. Until then, I hope you're alright and can manage on your own. And if you have any time on your hands, maybe you should have a vacation of your own. I miss you._

_Love, Virginia "Pepper" Potts, your assistant x_

Tony blinked to himself then smiled. He read the message again, pondering the little x at the end of the message. He was on her thoughts even on vacation.

"Well, that counts for something" he said to himself.

He was about to replying back when it happened, his fingers flying over the keyboard like raindrops on a windowsill. There was a dull whine and a moan from the machine, and frowning Tony looked up to see the screen had frozen and a flurry of windows attacking the glass, as if trying to hammer their way out and hit his face.

"Someone's trying to hack into my stuff" he said blankly, as still as a statue for a moment, before he began tapping hastily at the keys, trying to fix the virus that was corrupting his data.

"Come on!" he grunted, fiddling with all the buttons and plugs. Usually, he could work magic on any piece of technology, and if someone had miraculously and unfortunately managed to hack into his files, then he could fix the problem with a snap of his fingers. But technology wasn't on his side today, as with an angry hiss, a fountain of copper sparks issued from the screen as it shattered. Tony yelped as a fierce current slithered up his fingers that were touching the smoking device, and with a jolt he fell backwards into his chair, and then toppled backwards off it onto his arse.

Another shock made his body quiver, and he felt a lurch in his arc reactor. Groggily but hastily, he sat up to check it was still functioning. It seemed alright, but after being electrocuted there would still be a little internal damage. He got to his feet and looked at dismay at the computer. It still spat out sparks, but at least it was smoking anymore. After the incident with the washing machine in the utility room, he'd had enough of wailing fire alarms.

He could replace the computer, and besides, he had dozens more, not to mention back up memory sticks and such like. But it was still unnerving to know that someone was hacking into his stuff. He had three questions: who was it, why did they try and do that, and how on earth did he manage to destroy the computer? Perhaps technology was repelling him.

_Don't say that!_ said a little voice in the back of his head.

He sighed, and went to sit back down. However, the office chair had rolled of elsewhere and with nothing but air underneath him he tripped and fell back on the floor again.

_Darn, sorry if this isn't like the other, better chapters before hand, but writer's block is a killer for imagination. But please review, I like reviews. ^^_


	8. Driving

_Another chapter, and this time, it's gonna be quite short. Sorry if any car terms are wrong, but I'm too young to drive ha ha!_

Tony got to his feet, frowning. He glared at the shattered computer screen before yelling "JARVIS!?"

"There's no need to shout, sir," replied JARVIS politely. "I can hear you wherever you go."

Tony gritted his teeth. The machine was annoyingly right. He sighed before saying "I'm going out for a while, and I'm not sure what time I'll come back, but please, keep an eye - a figurative eye – on de Leon whilst I'm out. I don't want her messing up my house."

"Where are you going, sir?" asked JARVIS, sounding a little startled.

Tony shrugged. "Not exactly sure at the moment, I'll make it up as I go along. I just need to go for a drive someplace, try and clear my head of the cobwebs, if you get what I'm saying."

"I understand, sir." He paused before adding. "Don't be gone too long, sir."

Tony snorted as he walked over to his collection of pristine, valuable cars, the metal alight with polished sheen. "You sound like my Mom. I expect you'll be all worried when I come back after 9pm."

JARVIS didn't reply, and Tony could tell the AI wasn't quite sure what to say. _That's kinda weird_ Tony thought.

He clambered into his Audi R8, the headlights flashing blue-white as the engine roared into life. With a slight squeal of the tyres, he sped out of the mansion via the tunnelled driveway, the orange fluorescent lights reflecting off the silver bonnet.

Tony instantly relaxed and sunk deep into the plush leather upholstery of the car seat as he drove away from his cliff-top mansion. It felt good to go out on a drive with no destination in mind, no time limit to break, just the open road ahead. His fingers lightly gripped the steering wheel as he opened the windows, and felt a cool evening breeze play across his face. He opened the glove compartment and rummaged around till he found his pair of shades and placed them over his eyes, shielding them against the intense glare of the setting sun.

He streaked off down the freeway, keeping clear of the city lights that were beginning to flicker on. He didn't want to be caught in the evening rush hour congestion, and besides, he couldn't exactly go fast through the city's narrow grid-like streets. On the freeway, he could flash past like a silvery bullet and not be obstructed by traffic lights.

His eyes flicked to the speedometer, and he quickly lightened the pressure on the accelerator. He hadn't realised he'd been going over 100mph. Tony Stark, the infamous Iron Man, or not, the police would still probably give him a speeding ticket.

He idly watched the Californian landscape fly past his slightly tinted windows, the sun blanketing everything in a dark red gauze and creating long stretched shadows. Tony didn't know where he was going; he was just following his instincts and driving wherever he felt like. Just then, a soft buzzing in his pocket alerted him that his Blackberry was ringing. He picked it up and saw that Rhodey was calling.

"Rhodey, hey what's up?"

"Hey Tony," answered Rhodey's voice. "Just calling to see if you're OK."

"And, why would I not be OK?" Tony replied, slightly puzzled.

"No particular reason. Is it now a federal crime to ask if someone's good?"

"Not to my knowledge. Is that all you wanted to call me for?"

"Well, no, not really. It's just…" there was a crackling down the cell phone as the colonel sighed. "Has anything suspicious been going on?"

"Suspicious?" Tony paused. "I don't think so. Depends what you classify as 'suspicious'. Is there something going on that I should know about?"

"No, no!" exclaimed Rhodey. "It's just strange times, you know?"

"Er, whatever you say" murmured Tony whilst he steered to the left.

"So, you managing the house OK by yourself?" asked Rhodey.

"It's not bad," said Tony. "I've got someone cleaning up the mess as we speak."

"Ah-huh," replied Rhodey. "Ah, sorry Tony, gotta go. Maybe I'll come round your place tomorrow, OK?"

"See ya Platypus" and with that Tony hung up.

_Rhodey sure was acting weird_ thought Tony and he turned around and started heading home. Tony wondered if he was alright, and if maybe he ought to call again and demand what was wrong, but then decided against it. After a half hour drive, Tony was back at his mansion and climbing out the Audi.

"Miss me, JARVIS?" asked Tony as he shut the car door.

"No, not really," replied the AI. "Why would I miss _you_?"

"Cut it out, JARVIS, you're not being funny."

"Yes, sir." Tony was half-expecting JARVIS to reply with 'whatever, sir.' "Oh, I should mention that the maid I hired has gone. She seemed very annoyed when you weren't there to give her her pay check."

Tony smirked. "Good riddance to her. Did she touch any of my stuff?"

"No, the house is fine, and a lot cleaner than it's been in two days."

"Shut it, JARVIS," said Tony rolling his eyes. "Your sarcasm is starting to give me a migraine." It was true, his migraine was coming back. And he hadn't had any booze to fuel it either.

_Sorry it was so short, but I'm afraid my imagination is leaking out of a hole in my head. _

_Urgent Note!!! Chapters 6 and 7 weren't exactly that great, and I kinda forgot that's it meant to be about Tony being unable to look after himself. I solemnly swear that the chapter nine and onwards will be like the first few chapters aka a lot better! _


	9. Food?

_OK, here's the next chapter. I've realised that after chapter 5, the whole story went to pot. I completely forgot what the whole story was about, and now I slack myself on the head for that! This chapter, and all the rest, definetly won't be as crummy as the ones before. I promise this one is gonna be good! So without further ado, I present to you the new (well old) and improved chapter!_

_Oh yes, I forgot to mention, it's now Day 3, dawn._

Tony didn't think he would be able to sleep again after all the rest he'd had the day before, but he surprised himself and had a very long and dreamless nap. He woke to the sound of gentle rain pattering on the crystalline windows, tapping out a soft rhythm. He got out of bed, which had been tidied by that horrible maid the day before, and went downstairs.

"Good morning, sir" JARVIS greeted as usual.

"Morning" Tony replied back, as was the routine.

"You know, sir," said JARVIS rather absent-mindedly. "You've actually been able to look after yourself for two whole days all alone."

"Impressive, huh?" said Tony as he walked to the kitchen. He felt quite relaxed this morning, perhaps because of lack of stress and the soothing beat of rain against the glass. He ignored the AI's sarcasm and answered with unbothered replies.

He opened the fridge's door and looked around its cool exterior. He frowned, shook his head and looked again. There was barely anything there, the great size of within making the vacant space even emptier. The only items stored there were a half-empty tub of butter, a few slices of cheese, ketchup, ice cubes and a pizza, but the last item was way off date. Tony checked the frost-rimmed freezer too, but that was just as empty. Getting worried now, Tony opened each of the cupboards in turn and found to his disappointment that there was hardly any food, none of which you could piece together to make a meal.

Tony' stomach grumbled, to which he answered "It's not my fault there's nothing here, you're just going to have to go hungry." He shut the cupboard door a little harder then he meant, and it snapped off its hinges, a sharp corner piercing one of his feet.

He hissed through clenched teeth and grabbed his sore foot as the unhinged door fell to the tiled floor with a dull thud, hopping around on the spot like a moron. He cursed as he pulled out a splinter and threw it into the trash. Tony glared at the door. "I'll fix you later" he said menacingly, pointing to the door, which stared back blankly and of course didn't reply.

"Erm, sir, you don't usually talk to household furniture do you?" JARVIS asked timidly, but irony dripped off the mechanical words.

Tony chose not to reply and said, mainly to himself, "We're out of food. I guess I'd better get some more."

"Good thinking, sir!"

Tony couldn't resist it any longer. "JARVIS, please shut up."

**

A few moments later, Tony was washed and dressed (the clothes were a little creased and not exactly fragrant, as Tony made a mental note to stay away from any appliances beginning in with "washing" and ending in "machine") and was heading down into the basement to his cars when the AI's voice interrupted his thoughts.

"Sir, do you think you should go out?" suggested JARVIS.

"What are you talking about, you messed-up machine?" said Tony with a sigh. He was half-way through formulating a grocery list and now he couldn't remember what he'd just added. "Am I not allowed outside the house? Is there some mass-murdered waiting for me in the driveway and is gonna stab me as soon as I step foot outside? C'mon JARVIS, I know a hell of a lot of people want to kill me, but I don't need a bodyguard or anything to go downtown."

"No, that's not what I'm talking about!" cried JARVIS in exasperation. "Sir, you're Iron Man-"

"Oh, well done for noticing!" answered Tony taking another step towards his automobiles.

"What I mean to say," continued JARVIS, the volume of . "Is that you can't exactly enter a supermarket. You're a celebrity, a millionaire-"

"Billionaire" Tony corrected him, but his attention was now fixed on the AI.

"And a superhero. As soon as you go to a public place, the paparazzi will be on you quicker than two attracted magnets."

Tony leant against the side of one of his work benches, and sighed. JARVIS was right. It seemed the AI was right about more things than he was nowadays. Tony was one of the most famous people in the whole of the US of A, and just about anyone would recognize his face in a flash. He got a whole load of attention from the press anyway, but people would be surprised to see him around town, shopping like any normal, non-famous person.

"I guess Pepper doesn't draw any attention to herself when she get's the groceries" he mumbled. "But I can't starve, JARVIS. I could survive of take-aways for the rest of the week, sure, but I need more sustenance than fast-food."

JARVIS paused before saying "I could find someone else to do it for you…"

"Er, I don't think so," Tony scolded. "Remember what happened the last time you ordered someone in for me? It was only yesterday, you should recall that mistake."

Yes, sir," the AI sighed, "And I suppose you have a better idea, oh great superhero-genius?"

"I'm warning you, JARVIS" Tony threatened darkly, and resisted the urge to shake a fist at the empty air. But he didn't really have a better idea. Well, actually, now that he thought of it, he had the same idea but a much better version. He himself would call someone in, the only problem was, who?

He walked upstairs and went to the study on the second floor. Most of his stuff was kept in his office at Stark Industries, and the more personal records were kept down in the basement on ghost files. But space was always slipping from his fingers every time he updated his suit or had more business files to store. The little study was meant for storage purposes mainly, but was hardly used at all, and when Tony entered the room he wasn't surprised to see a thin layer of dust had cumulated on the desktop.

The room was not very big, and was made smaller by the shelves and filing cabinets that lined most of the walls. It was very unlike the fridge where space was definitely not at a premium.

He clicked a button and the blinds immediately lifted, dull, cloud-filtered light shining through the window. He sat in the squashy armchair and rifled through his contact cards, muttering the name of each as he went through them.

"Nick Fury, Avenger Initiative, no way, he's the last person I'd go to help for… Rhodey, nah, he's too busy…" after a while there was only one card left. "Let's hope this is the one."

He looked at the little slip of tattered card before him, and then screwed it up and chucked it at the waste-paper basket with a grunt, the little paper missile missing it's target by a mile. It had actually been a coupon for buy on get one free soda, and he had no idea how it had fallen into his contact cards.

"Take-aways it is!" said Tony, pushing away his chair and walking out of the room.

_*sigh* This isn't very good either. Ah well. I really don't like to beg, but please, please, PLEASE review me! Perhaps it will inspire me better! ^^_


	10. Pepper returns

_Hello! Sorry I've been away for ever, but I've been too focused on my other stories, namely my Ghost Rider ones. _

_But here we are! It is with a heavy heart that I give you the final chapter of "Home Alone." Why is it ending now? Because it kinda spiralled out of control and now I want to finish it with one final chapter. Sure, there are a lot of unanswered questions, but there's a little Pepperony ;) _

_OK, it's Day 4 (yeah, I skipped a day), and its evening__._

The curtains of night were closing upon the setting sun, golden dusty rays of sunlight breaking through the gossamer grey clouds. Tony stood by the huge windows, staring out of the glass, his mind lost in the depths of thought. The fading light threw amber and crimson upon his tired face and enhanced the shadows beneath his dark eyes.

A humming vibration in his pocket broke his ponderings, and blinking away the thoughts that still lingered before his eyes, he reached into his pocket and examined his cell phone. He twitched in alarm and anticipation.

_You have one message from Pepper Potts._

He hastily opened up the message, and his heart rate jumped up as he read it, the blood loud in his ears.

_Tony, I'll be back at your mansion in 5 minutes. Pepper._

A smirk pulled up at the corners of Tony's lips, his ebony eyes gleaming a little. But then his eyebrows knotted together in confusion.

_God damnit, Tony_, he thought to himself. _She's been away for longer before, why so excited to see her back?_

His imprisonment by the terrorists the Ten Rings was called to mind. He was in captivity for three months then, away from friends and colleges and hospitable people (except Yinsen, of course), and even though he'd been very pleased to see his faithful assistant, it wasn't quite the same exhilarating emotion that he was feeling now. Perhaps it was because Pepper wasn't so much on his mind then. He was defiantly more concerned about escaping alive with the insanely suicidal plan of making an armoured suit to fly away in.

He stuffed his cell phone back in his pocket and quickly strode through the mansion in search of a mirror, his footsteps on the polished sleek floor rapid like rain against marble. Once he located a reflective surface, he studied his appearance, his smile collapsing when he realised what a terrible state he was in.

One glance was enough to tell him that he currently looked like a bum. His hair was ruffled and almost spiky with neglect and untameable. He had dark indigo shadows under his eyes, which were a little blood-shot and glazy. His face had a pinched look, and he ran a hand over his chin that was thick with bristled of black, as his usually neat beard had grown out of control. He tentatively raised his arm and sniffed his armpit, his nose wrinkling at the stale odour. He glanced back at himself, eyebrow raised.

"Hmm, I've really let myself go" he murmured.

"I agree, sir" piped up JARVIS.

Tony scowled and looked up, talking to no visible object that he could decide to place as JARVIS. "You damn piece of infuriating, dim, cynical machinery! Since when did you have a sense of humour? I didn't build you this… annoying!" But a chuckle escaped his throat: he couldn't stay mad at his AI. After all, JARVIS helped him out these past few days. Kind of.

Tony flattened down his hair into a reasonable state, sniffing as he straightened his rumpled shirt and flickered on that charming gin that had women swooning over him. He attempted to a pull a pose, as if the paparazzi had their cameras aimed at him and their intense lights were flashing and shattering the evening gloom.

"C'mon Tony, work that style." He laughed out loud at the ridiculous statement and shook his head. He wasn't exactly pulling off the scruffy rugged look. He really wished he had more time to make himself appear more presentable, but it was the best he could do within 5 minutes.

There was a mechanical whine from within the mansion, and Tony sucked in a breath and turned around.

"It would appear that your assistant Miss Potts has returned, sir" stated JARVIS, and if the AI had a face, Tony was certain he'd be smirking.

"OK" said Tony, letting out a long sigh. He rushed through the house and after tapping in a code and removing the lock, opened the door, pulling it back to reveal a woman standing at the porch. A black glossy Mercedes was parked not far away on the tree-lined driveway, with Hogan unloading two suitcases from the trunk.

"Good evening, Mr Stark" smiled Pepper.

The sunlight filtering down from the shifting clouds made Pepper's hair burn like copper flames, a few strands escaping the tight bun and sweeping across her face by a cool wind. She looked pleased to see her boss, a warm smile brightening her features, but her expression froze and turned to surprised shock.

"Oh dear, Tony. What have you done to yourself?"

Tony sheepishly looked down at himself and brushed away invisible dust from his shirt. "I didn't do it to myself on purpose, y'know."

"Maybe I shouldn't have gone on vacation," said Pepper with an eyebrow raised as she eyed him. "If I'd known you would have ended up like this…"

"Hey, you gotta give me some credit. I survived without help from anyone, didn't I? I'm not completely useless, like you might think."

Before Pepper could reply, Tony had peered over her shoulder and was talking to Hogan.

"Hey, bring in the bags, Hogan."

"Will do, sir" he answered.

"Come in, Pep" smiled Tony, stepping back and holding the door wider. As she stepped over the threshold, Pepper sighed and put her hands on her hips. "Wow, I've never seen the place so messed up. What on earth have you been doing?"

Tony paused. "Not a lot, actually."

"It's going to take a long time to get this place in order" said Pepper, turning on the spot as she surveyed the main room, her killer heels tapping on the cold floor.

"Want me to help you?" offered Tony.

"You? Help me?" scoffed Pepper shaking her head. "I leave you in charge, it'll end up looking worse."

"You know, sometimes your comments really hurt me" said Tony, faking melancholy.

"I thought you were the _invincible_ Iron Man?" asked Pepper, reshuffling some papers on the floor.

"I am," retorted Tony. "If an F-22 Raptor can't pierce my armour, then very little will, and hey, please let me help you, I don't want to feel like a lazy old git."

He bent down beside her and scooped up some old magazines and newspapers that were scattered underneath the glass table.

"No, Tony, let me do it, you just go do your superhero stuff in the basement. You usually do that."

As Tony opened his mouth to answer, he raised his head and smashed his head against the table with a hollow thud; some objects on top the glass surface actually jumping into the air with the force of the hit.

Tony yelped and clutched his head. "Son of a-!"

"Are you alright?" asked Pepper, pushing aside the items she was collecting and reaching out a hand towards her boss.

Tony winced. "Yeah, I'm fine." He removed his hand and found a trickle of blood spilt startling crimson on his fingers.

"Here" sighed Pepper, taking out a tissue from her pocket and carefully, tenderly dabbing the cut. "Better?" she asked with a playful smile.

"Yes, tones better, I feel as fit as a fiddle" smirked Tony, but there was warmth in his eyes. Pepper didn't remove her hand from Tony's scalp; the two of them paused on their knees, just looking at each other.

The time trickled by unbroken in that moment of stillness. The ribbon of some strange spark between them only snapping when Tony coughed and looked away.

"I should be, erm, seeing if Nick Fury's got any more details on the, uh, Avenger initiative."

"Oh, yes, yes," nodded Pepper turning away and standing up. "I'll be tidying up."

"Right."

"Yeah."

There was a heartbeat of awkwardness, but before Pepper made to walk off into the kitchen (Tony gulped inwardly when he realised that Pepper was going to have a fit at the state of the room), he cried out "Hey, Pepper!"

When she turned back, Tony could see small hints of colour fading from her cheeks.

"Yes, sir?" she inquired.

Tony struggled with himself a little, before murmuring. "Did you miss me?"

Pepper hesitated, before a smile crept up her face. "Of course, sir."

_Complete! End, done, fin. I hope you enjoyed it, despite the craziness of the later chapters. I hope you particularly liked the Tony/Pepper moment a the end – I couldn't resist. _

_Look out for more Iron Man fics from me in the future! ^^_


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